Must be getting old...

[senoritafish]

I'm sorry but the subtitle for the Monitor's review of New Moon, just made me laugh.

"The latest in the 'Twilight' series, 'New Moon' follows a moping Bella who continues to have poor choice in men."

As much as I used to be a big fan of vampires (is Fred Saberhagen's The Dracula Tapes still in print?), the more I hear of the Twilight series, the less I think I would like it. I know I'm totally NOT the demographic this is aimed at, and I've never been a huge fan of the romance genre anyway, but teenage romance stories have been grating on me lately. For cripes sake, how many people are with the same person they dated in high school - and I qualify that with the fact that, yes, I do know of a few personally, but as a whole it's pretty rare. My own high school love life was, if not a disaster, fairly bleak. That continued until I was in college - mostly due to my own social ineptness, I'm now seeing.

And I'm probably missing a major plot point here because I haven't read the books or seen the movie, but - whatinhell's a more than a century old vampire doing cruising the local high school for underage chicks anyway? Makes the typical Hollywood age difference pairing thing (i.e. Catherine Zeta-Jones/Sean Connery) seem positively appropriate.

WHERE ARE THE KICK ASS MIDDLE-AGED FAT HEROINES WITH GRAYING HAIR DAMMIT?!

Oh, that's right. They all became moms, or priestesses, or nuns or something. Not that those aren't worthy worthwhile things, but not the stuff that sells a lot of books or summerblockbuster movies, unless they've become the aging revenge-driven head of an evil corporation/religion/empire that has to be destroyed before the epilogue.

*Grumps *

getoffamylawnyadamnkids...

Comments

[konoichi.livejournal.com]

Ugh. I have what I call "completion sickness," which caused me to read the first for a laugh and then skim all the rest. I deeply regret it. They are downright frustrating books.

I feel you on the lack of anyone but teenage cutie pies in fiction. (Barbara Hambly's Dragonsbane and its following books have a middle-aged heroine, and they're great.)

[senoritafish.livejournal.com]

I've read some Barbara Hambly in the past but I can't remember what it was. Someone else recommended her too, so I'll have to look those up.

I did like Paladin of Souls by Lois McMaster Bujold, where the main character may not have been kickass, but I did identify with her a bit more.

[mskauri.livejournal.com]

WHERE ARE THE KICK ASS MIDDLE-AGED FAT HEROINES WITH GRAYING HAIR DAMMIT?!

EXACTLY!! C'mon Hollywood...remember that women live longer and control the expenditures in the household...give us a reason to give you our money!

[senoritafish.livejournal.com]

Damn straight!

[otana.livejournal.com]

My best friend made me watch Twilight the other night. The first movie, whatever that one's called. We had to get drunk to do it and I don't ever recall seeing a more pointless movie.

We talked over 60% of it and missed absolutely nothing. Bella and Edward's relationship was intensely creepy and horribly unhealthy, the entire film was tinted blue, the cameraman was clearly as drunk as we were ... I could go on.

There's a video on youtube that condenses the movie into 4 minutes. Frankly? They didn't miss a thing. I was genuinely insulted.

I did try to read New Moon once at a birthday party with some friends; a friend ordered a book for me and Barnes and Noble sent this instead of what she had ordered. We got so angry after two paragraphs that we tore it up. I wish I was kidding, but those books are just dreadful.

[senoritafish.livejournal.com]

omg - found this: http://stoney321.livejournal.com/317176.html

So I never have to read them at all! Weirdly, it seems Edward is the perfect LDS boy.

[rosehiptea.livejournal.com]

I doubt I would like Twilight either, though my daughter said she might read it.

Now I want to see a movie with a kick-ass middle-aged fat heroine with graying hair.

[senoritafish.livejournal.com]

If I can pick them up used somewhere (or maybe borrrow from my friend, who apparently loves them), I might try them out just to see what all the ruckus is about. All the swooning is a bit nauseating though. If you look at the link in the reply above, it sounds like the whole thing is thinly veiled Mormonism (although that writer doubts SM realized that's what she wrote).

RE: Movie - me too!